10/26/08

!!!BREAKING NEWS!!!

The Lions are not good.


That is all.

10/25/08

Wings Beat Hawks in Shootout

I just checked the score, because I detest the shootout enough that I never watch it. The final was 6-5, and despite the high score, both goalies played well. There was just a ton of scoring chances, something Mike Babcock won't like a whole lot. Pavel Datsyuk scored a goal that will end up on youtube by tomorrow, and I'll update it here when it does. These guys are just awesome to watch.

Penn State beats OSU at the 'Shoe

And the disappointment in Brent Musberger's failing voice is palpable. Every sentence he said during this game had the phrase, "the young Terrel Pryor." "The young Terrel Pryor" was 6 of 10 on third down, not OSU. "The young Terrel Pryor" was starting a drive at the 31 yard line, not OSU.



Kirk Herbstriet wasn't exactly ecstatic either. JoePa gets his first win at the 'Shoe since 1978. He and Penn State are killing all kinds of streaks this year. Maybe they can end the Ohio State Big Ten streak of losing in the NC game. They'll get there at 12-0 with a Texas and/or Alabama loss.

Paul Bunyan Goes to East Lansing

Two wins, six losses. We knew this season was gonna be tough, but this is not good. Now, Big Blue is one loss away from ending the nation's longest bowl and non-losing season streaks. It's OK, because we can see the light at the end of the tunnel, but now that it's upon us, it stings a bit.

The offense was explosive at points, but dreadful for the most part. Threet ran the ball well at times, and not in others. Threet threw the ball well at times, and not in others. The O-line was awful, and even if Threet could throw, he never had the time to do anything anyway. The reason DickRod is yelling at Threet in this picture is a bad read by Threet on a blitz, he looked right, and only right, and should have been picked off.

Now, Sparty earned this one. There was no "extra second," or a bad pass interference no-call, or blatant holding on the game winning play. The refs were awful, but they were awful on both sides, and definitely didn't cost Michigan the game.

The worst part about this? We're gonna be hearing about it from Sparty fan for the better part of a decade. "Remember when Taylor guaranteed victory? Huh huh.. how'd that work out?"

Try winning more than one game in the second half of the season once, Sparty, then start talking.

Can I make one more point? Those of you who know me, know that I hate almost all national announcers. There are very few that can pull off a neutral call of the game, and most are certified idiots. Chris Spielman was the color man for this one, and I LOVE listening to him. I always learn something new about the game when he calls it. And Sean McDonough knows enough to stay the hell out of his way, and just call the play-by-play. On the other side of the coin, Gary "I've always known SEC football is the best" Danielson was calling the Georgia-LSU game. As LSU was lining up for an onside kick at the end of the game, Gary actually tried to make a point about having to change the rules because now, teams are having their kickers try to bounce the ball up in the air, and they send players in to take out the receiving team, and they might get hurt. Yeah Gary- this is on-thinkable[sic]. This has only been going on for, I don't know, a century? Teams have ALWAYS kicked the ball for that big hop. And the prefix "un-" rhymes with bun, not Don.

Got Hockey?

For the second time since the league expanded to 30 teams, all 30 of them are in action today.

Detroit is at Chicago tonight, and they are unveiling the jerseys they will wear on New Years Day at Wrigley field.

College Football, 15 NHL games, and a World Series game all in one day? I would say awesome, but the World Series holds absolutely no interest for me. And this is coming from a guy who can watch a spring training game on TV from start to finish.

10/24/08

HOSSA!

Finally, Hossa is off the schneid. After scoring #300 in OT the other night against the Rangers, Hossa nets two more tonight, including a highlight reel goal in the first.



Oh, and Zetterberg scored twice too.

5-3 Wings beat Thrashers.

Meanwhile, the vast right-wing conspiracy continues in St. Louis. According to NHL.com, Blues goalie Manny Legacy had to leave after the first period due to an injury after tripping over the carpet laid out for Sarah Palin to drop the ceremonial first puck.

What if sports were the economy?

With apologies to EJ, I promise this will be my only semi-political post...

Courtesy Chicago Tribune, October 28, 2009.
After 101 years of waiting, the Cubs finally have their World Series trophy!



After finishing in a tie with all other 29 teams for first place at 0-0-162, the Cubs can finally celebrate a World's Championship!

"I just can't tell you how good it feels to finally have a championship and to bring here to the North Side of Chicago," said manager Lou Pinella. "We really didn't play all that well, or even that hard, but we didn't need to because the President told us he would give us all a chance to win!"

What Lou was referring to is the Fairness in Athletics Doctrine, or FAD. Earlier this year, President Obama pushed through legislation that forbade any official scorer from declaring any winners or losers in any athletic event. All 30 teams finished with the same record, and in the future, the trophy will be passed from team to team. Chicago gets it in 2009. Detroit and Cincinnati are vying for the trophy next year, with the congressional hearings scheduled to start early February. But the good money is on Cincinnati, because the Lions are scheduled to lift the Lombardi trophy around that time.

"It is finally time, uh, that all fans of every team, uh, not just those of the teams most talented, or hardest working, should get to have their day to raise the trophy," said President Obama. "We pushed this through because the failed policies of the Bush administration are hurting the middle class because when they go to the bar sporting their colors, they get ridiculed and leave the bar, and this hurts the economy."

It was scenes like these that prompted the president to approach senate majority leader Harry Reid to begin talks about eliminating the bad feelings that come from a person's team suffering defeat. "We saw the joy in people's eyes when the Patriots were beaten two years ago in the Super Bowl, and we wanted that all the time," said Reid. "It's not enough to strive to be excellent. Those of us in Washington need to make it reality for everyone!"

Conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh calls this a travesty, citing his Pittsburgh Steelers (9-0 currently, 0-0-9 officially) chances at winning this year. "The disparity between the haves and the have nots has been widening ever since Bush stole the election in 2000," said Reid, "and Washington was broken. We needed to step in and make sure everybody gets a fair shake. The Lions have won exactly one playoff game in 52 years, and those fans deserve to see their team win it."

As an offshoot of the doctrine, Michigan resident and Detroit Red Wing fan Dan Blakeslee's lawsuit against the Red Wings has gone all the way to the Supreme Court. "It isn't fair that GM Ken Holland should keep me off of the Red Wings. Just because I'm slow, can't shoot, and have no endurance to even skate up and down the ice one time shouldn't mean that I get left off the team." Blakeslee won his lawsuit, but the judgment was stayed while the Red Wings appeal. Originally, the judgment forced all NHL players to wear weights around their legs and arms, thus making an even playing field, or ice in this case, for everyone who wants to play. The Sixth Circuit upheld the ruling, citing FAD specifically. When asked how Blakeslee is preparing for the games to come, he said, "why prepare? If I get slower, they have to, too. So I am playing video games in the meantime." The NHL is preparing a "hockey skills czar," to oversee the lowest skilled player to play, and bring down the rest of the league to their level. MLB, the NFL, and the NBA are preparing for the onslaught as well, creating positions for similar duties.

The Toronto Maple Leafs are scheduled to skate with the Stanley Cup next June, despite not being an American team and thus, exempt from FAD. The Utah Jazz are slated to take the NBA's top prize, as well.

MSU-UM weekend

The boys over at Michigan Against the World are having fun with the game this weekend...

Check it out.

10/22/08

More Blakeslee Boys on the way

So it turns out the twins, both of them, are boys.

WOO HOO!!!

10/20/08

Fail.

David Ortiz: F
Jason Veritek: F
JD Drew: Check swing D
Jason Bay: C
Dustin Pedroia: A

Pedroia was the only one it looked like wanted to play more baseball. Ortiz was terrible, Veritek looked like Pudge, and JD Drew check-swung his way to critical strikouts. This team looked good for three innings in game 5, a couple in game 6, and exactly zero in Game 7.

Enjoy the time off gents. You've earned it. This may be the first World Series I don't watch since I can remember. Philly? Who cares? Tampa Bay? Move to a baseball stadium and maybe I'll watch.

Extra Fail to MLB for starting the Series THREE DAYS after the end of the ALCS. Can you imagine if this thing ended in five?

10/19/08

Game 7

I've said it before, I'll say it again. There is absolutely nothing in sports like a Game 7. The NFL playoffs like to push the idea that every game is Game 7. Bullshit. It's Game 1 of one. You don't have the back stories. You don't have the team that has been on the ropes, all of the sudden on equal footing.

Picture from MLB.com.


The only thing that would make this one better would be a halfway decent venue. The Trop, in a word, blows. It is sterile, the "grass" looks dead (hint to Tampa: grass is green, not lime), and it is INSIDE. Just for this reason, the Rays deserve to lose. I don't want to watch more baseball next week in this horseshit park.

Go Sawx!

10/18/08

It's been a while.

7 weeks of being laid-off, massive quantities of homework, and I'm back. Still unemployed, but back.

Maybe.

Since UM beat Wisky, let's see what else has happened.

- The NHL has begun. The Maple Leafs got to see a banner raised for the first time since we landed on the Moon. Unfortunately for them, it was in Detroit. But then they beat the Wings, yada yada yada.

- The Lions are 0-5. Who knew? But they traded Roy Williams to Dallas for a 1, a 3, and a 6th round pick. Roy Williams = Herschel Walker.

- UM hasn't won since that comeback. Including at home against Toledo. Ugh.

- The BoSox scored 8 runs in the 7th, 8th, and 9th innings to come back and beat Tampa Bay in a must-win Game 5 in the ALCS. Boston goes on to win this series, and Carlos Pena relives that 9th inning DP over and over and over and over...